Dear Someone XXVIII

Dear Someone,

My therapist is making me write down all my negative thoughts, and then turning them to rational thoughts.

I started.

And, even though it sounds easy, my chest hurt and I couldn’t even breathe.

When you build up layers of walls, it’s hard to knock them down.

Five pages so far. I had to stop, so there’s more.

The hardest one to write down was, I hate myself and everything that has happened to me is my fault. I deserve death and everything that has happened that to me. 

I looked at what my hands had written, and I started to cry.

Because, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t come up with a rational thought for it.

I believe it.

Isn’t that screwed up…

Love,

Liv

 

 

 

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3 thoughts on “Dear Someone XXVIII

  1. I don’t know what to say because I can’t change what you are going through but I honestly hope that you find happiness and that the pain you are feeling goes away. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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