My life is really pathetic at the moment and confusing. Inception times 10.
First off, trying to figure out what college I want to go to. What major I want, because again though I would die if I worked in engineering, science, or medical fields, I don’t know if writing is where I’m supposed to be. Like–what if I am a horrible writer, and no one tells me until I graduate. Then I’m stuck teaching a weird class for Elementary children.
Secondly, friends. Reading between the lines and figuring who is always there for me, and who just isn’t. And balancing them all, because none of them like each other. I feel like an ambassador between different countries and one day I’m going to die of over working myself.
Thirdly, school is such a horrible thing. At the beginning of the school year I think I’m happy for it to be back. But–by this time, I want to slam all my text-books onto the closest wall and shred all my notes. Good grades, nah. You know, never mind because my parents would kill me (metaphorically) if I quit.
The fourth problem is that I’m constantly confused about love. I think I know something and I’m moving on…and then I’m wrong. So I watch Parks and Rec, wish I had a guy like Ben and laugh until I feel lonely. I write stupid poems. I listen to weird music (Country?!). I sass and act like I hate everything, because I feel as if I’m going to explode. (Really close to exploding and almost cried when I made a wish on a star.)
Right now, I’m supposed to be doing school, math, science, and history, but my mind is loopy. So I sit listening to UGH by The 1975 and writing this gloomy and probably hysterical article.
Guys, I’m really insane. And I’m sorry I rambled so long about my problems.